Chelsea - Global Domination : Mission Failed.....Epically Failed

I’ll roll the records back to Friday 24^th November 2006, two days before Chelsea visited Old Trafford for the following: 

The Premiership title race's day of judgement looms on Sunday but the phoney war started yesterday when Peter Kenyon laid out Chelsea's plans to be the biggest club in the world by 2014 - and, in doing so, overhauling Manchester United's pre-eminence as the most famous name in English football.

Peter Kenyon arrogantly declared how Chelsea were on course to be the biggest club in the world. Five years and five managers later they are no closer now than they were then. I’ve made this point a few times on this blog and if I’m boring you, then what’s new. The reason I raise it again is despite Chelsea’s attempts to turn themselves into a football giant, they are failing. 

The Asian market is the Promised Land for football clubs. Fanatical supporters  who treat players like superstars and buy merchandise en masse. The revenue clubs make from that part of the world is the only explanation required for the long haul trips they make there every pre season. This season Chelsea have boarded Air Asia in search of supporters and the riches they bring. So imagine my enjoyment when I saw the turnout for Chelsea’s big welcome to Malaysia.

Now Liverpool were in the exact same stadium, only four days ago so in the interest of fairness we can compare the two turnouts.

So one of these clubs is “on course for global domination”, and the other is without a league title in decades and can’t even offer European football of any kind this season.

Again, in the interest of fairness, let’s compare Chelsea’s Far East support with the club Peter Kenyon so arrogantly declared they were going to “overhaul”.

Seriously, take your pick. Let’s try Arsenal. A club who haven’t won a trophy for fucking years. 

Hours of fun! It just goes to prove you really ain't got no 'isssstory. Even the Asians aren't buying your fake, plastic toy Mr Abramovich.

Once more, LET’S ALL LAUGH AT CHELSEA.

Summer Musings Part 1

So how is everyone coping with the summer break so far? Bored yet? I am so I noted down some of my findings from the "Transfer Window sponsored by Sky Sports News". Enjoy.

Another summer, more dramas for Arsenal with another mass exodus on the cards, Clichy has gone, Nasri looks like he’s off and that’s before you remember the inevitable yearly Fabregas-Barcelona yawnfest. Almunia and Bendtner are supposedly in talks with other clubs but that is probably music to the ears of Arsenal fans. So naturally, we’ll soon be hearing the pre season predictions of doom that this is the year Arsenal finally implode and lose their “BIG FAB FOUR” status which they probably prove wrong, for about the fifth season running.

We can all breathe a sigh of relief when Cesc Fabregas finally gets his move to Barcelona so we don’t have to spend our entire summer hearing Barcelona and their players unashamedly tap up Fabregas using every trick in the book. To me it’s nothing more than a vanity purchase for Barcelona because I can’t see Fabregas replacing Xavi or Iniesta anytime soon.  

Unlike Nasri and Fabregas, Gael Clichy’s transfer is already complete and he’s become the latest Arsenal player to make the move from the Emirates to Eastlands, sorry the ETIHAD Stadium, translated as the UNITED Stadium (snigger). This seems as good a time as any to rewind back to 2009 when Mr Clichy said “I really believe if you are a player who thinks only about money then you could end up at Manchester City” (snigger). Oh the beauty of hindsight. To be fair, things have changed since 2009 and I don’t think you can accuse players of moving to Manchester City in the pursuit of their riches anymore. Sure it gives them a big advantage but now that they have won a trophy and have got themselves into the European Cup, for right or wrong, they now offer sporting opportunities as well as massive wage opportunities. 

News that City have agreed a new multi billion trillion dirham sponsorship deal with Etihad has already exposed how easily it will be for the Sheiks and the Russians of the world to manipulate FIFA’s new Financial Fair Play rules by injecting their cash into their clubs in the guise of “sponsorship”. The catch being that the owners of Etihad are the very same owners of Manchester City. Go financial “fair” play!!

Tottenham and Aston Villa are both digging their heels in over potential sales of key players Luka Modric and Stuart Downing. Both players “are not for sale” which is a similar stance both clubs took to Dimitar Berbatov and Gareth Barry not being for sale, before they were sold....... If anyone fancies a bet that come the first Tottenham v Aston Villa fixture of the season neither player will be playing for their current club, get in touch.  Infact as I type news breaks that Chelsea’s latest 27 million pound offer for Modric is “way below his value” according to Harry Redknapp. Fuck off you saggy faced moron.  ‘Arry naturally provided the quote out of his car window as he left the training ground. It’s hard to describe what an attention seeking media whore that man is. Redknapp and Sky Sports are filth, they deserve each other.

If any Liverpool fans haven't seen this video of the squad on their trip to China it's well worth a watch. It doesn't come as a surprise that the first sight we get of Joe Cole this season is him with his feet up.......eating.