As it's the end of the season I'll take a trip down memory lane and dish out some of these Golden Poulsen's at the 1st (maybe) Annual Toscars
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| Golden Poulsen's. |
It would be easy to name a team of the year full of Man Utd, Man City and Chelsea players (i.e the PFA Team of the Year). The problem with their side is they don’t seem to recognise the achievement of a player given the level of the side they are playing in. For example, Vincent Kompany is a great defender playing in a good side which naturally makes it “easier” to defend. But worthy of being in team of the year? No. I’ve done this side based on the players individual contribution to their teams performance this season considering the expectation level of the club they play for.
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| Pepe Reina |
It was a three way choice between Reina, Van der Sar and Joe Hart. I chose Reina because I am a bit biased but to be fair the stats are also in his favour. He played every minute of every game this season and was for at least half of that season playing behind a shambolic defence still managing a respectable fourteen clean sheets, the same as Van der Sar. Hart kept eighteen clean sheets but that’s easier when you have Kompany and Lescott infront of you, not Kyrgiakos and Skrtel.
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| Michel Salgado |
There are no outstanding candidates for right back this season. Bacary Sagna seems to be named in most teams of the season but I don’t think any Arsenal defensive players are deserving of recognition after the leads they have thrown away this season. Martin Kelly had a good run of form but his injury cut short his season. Rafael did well for Man Utd but he played in less than half their games. So because Salgado is pushing 40, for him to play 36 games this season deserves a bit of credit. I’m sure he’ll be thrilled to hear this news.
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| Nemanja Vidic |
With 36 appearances, 5 goals and a league winners medal Vidic is in every team of the year. It’s the most appearances Vidic has made in a league season since he signed for Man Utd and they only lost three games when he played.
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| Robert Huth |
I chose Robert Huth not just for his Premier League season but his contribution to Stoke’s FA Cup run. He played in 35 league games contributing 6 goals with a further 3 goals in their run to the cup final.
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| Leighton Baines |
Baines was an obvious choice for left back. He was another player who started in every game this season and managing 5 goals and 11 assists from left back is some achievement. His free kick against Chelsea in the FA Cup was a great highlight of the season for anybody that doesn’t like Chelsea too.
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| Scott Parker |
If you browse any West Ham forum with the exception of Rob Green, Parker is the only player most of their fans don’t want thrown out the club this summer. If West Ham had signed more Scott Parker’s and less Freddie Ljungberg’s/Kieron Dyer’s then I doubt they would be heading into the Championship. Before his injury West Ham were in decent form, after it is when their no wins in 7 began. Figures.
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| Luka Modric |
In my opinion Modric is one of the best midfielders in the whole league. If any Spurs midfielder should of won the awards Gareth Bale did, it should of been Modric. Only scored 3 goals in 32 starts this season but to quote his manager, “E’zz a top top PLAYA”.
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| Kevin Nolan |
It’s harsh to not put Charlie Adam into a team of the year but I’m going for Kevin Nolan because unlike Adam, his goals are mainly scored from open play. Plus unlike Blackpool, Newcastle didn’t get relegated and Nolan was their top scorer for the season with 12 goals. Without his goals Newcastle probably would have been relegated with or instead of Blackpool. Despite the annoying “chicken dance” – he’s in.
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| Peter Odemwingie |
His transfer from Lokomotiv Moscow to West Brom for 2.5 million is what you call value for money, considering he scored 15 goals through the season. It’s safe to suggest he can take a lot of the credit for West Brom playing in the Premier League next season.
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| Carlos Tevez |
I don’t like the guy, but let’s be honest, without him Man City are absolutely shit. He scored 20 goals from 31 starts this season and carries their side in the same way Torres did for Liverpool for a few years. If he does leave in the summer Man City will struggle to replace him.
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| Darren Bent |
His £20 million move to Aston Villa in January raised more than a few eyebrows but he was proven right in the end with his new team eventually finishing above his old team Sunderland. If you take the points earned directly from his 11 goals for Villa, they would have been relegated in 19th on 37 points. I doubt it’s a coincidence that Sunderland went from European challengers to at one stage relegation battlers once he left either.
Manager Of The Season
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| Fergie |
As much as I would like to give it to Kenny Dalglish for taking the team that “wasn’t Roy’s team so none of it is his fault at all, all the nasty Spaniards fault” and proving that myth wrong it has to go to Mr Ferguson. Off the pitch I think he is an arrogant bully, but on it he has done it again. The amount of times he has been written off and then built another title winning side, well it’s annoying! If Tony Pulis had won the FA Cup or Holloway had kept Blackpool up they would of got it. But as it is, there is only one winner, Alex Ferguson.
Game Of The Season – Tottenham 3-3 Arsenal
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| Wenger: Upset |
It’s a narrow win for one Arsenal collapse over another collapse at Newcastle. But this game was entertaining from start to finish and exposed everything that is right and wrong with Arsenal.
Signing Of The Season – Javier Hernandez
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| No nickname. |
Seen as Odemwingie got into my team of the year, I’ll give this one to the grown man I absolutely refuse to refer to as that Latin nickname. For apparently £8 million he was a bargain and would probably be worth at least double that now. Luis Suarez deserves an honourable mention as he had some massive boots to fill and made every Liverpool fan forget that Spanish twat very quickly.
Flop Of The Season - Fernando Torres
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| Tosser |
Speaking of that Spanish twat. On account of costing £50 million more, he beats Joe “Messi” Cole.
Most Improved Player Of The Year - Lucas Leiva
From zero to hero. Lucas Leiva. Fact.
The “Did I fucking hear that right?!” Moment of the Season Award
You can really take your pick through any Roy Hodgson press conference for the runners and riders for this. The writers of the This Is Anfield website even coined these as “Royisms”
Definition: A Royism is an inexplicable decision, quotation or action made by Liverpool manager Roy Hodgson. Royism’s were first detected in July 2010 and have multiplied precariously ever since. Execution of a Royism can leave the subject open to animosity and ridicule.
My personal favourites are:
They'll be a formidable challenge – there's no question about that.
Before the League Cup tie with League Two super power....Northampton Town
That was as good as we have played all season..... To get a result here – against Everton – would have been Utopia.
After the disgraceful performance at Goodison Park. Utopia? Liverpool won their last season.
It's not as if he'll be playing with a bunch of also-rans. I'm not asking him to play in the reserves.
On asking Torres to play against FC Utrecht, whilst also managing to really motivate the lads in the reserves
I think it would be a sad day for football and for Liverpool if someone who had been brought in with the pomp and circumstance, and the money it took them to release me from my previous contract, and being feted as one of England's best managers – if after eight games people are deciding this guy has got to go.
Ever the modest soul
But the ultimate “Royism” will always be
What do you mean do my methods translate? They have translated from Halmstad to Malmo to Orebo to Neuchatel Xamax to the Swiss national team. So I find the question insulting. To suggest that, because I have moved from one club to another, that the methods which have stood me in good stead for 35 years and made me one of the most respected coaches in Europe don’t suddenly work, is very hard to believe.
That’s quite enough Roy.
However, I will save the blushes of Roy Hodgson because nothing he said will come anywhere close to Sky Sports gobshite, Jamie Redknapp when I heard him talking about the signing of Paul Konchesky at the start of the season. The “Did I fucking hear that right?!” Moment of the Season Award goes to Mr Redknapp for:
"Liverpool fans, who may have been looking for big money signings, might not appreciate the quality of Paul Konchesky. But he's a good signing for Roy Hodgson, who knows what he is getting after they worked together at Fulham last season. I played with Paul at Spurs and he's a superb one-on-one defender, with quick feet and who loves the showdown between full-back and winger. It's hard to find good left backs. He's one of them."
Oh dear.....
